Monday, March 23, 2009

FOX News....Where 2+2=5

The recent stupidity of FOX News commentators mocking Canada and its Armed Forces was a surefire way to get my blood pressure up. Afterall, the rumours about social studies teachers are out there. We're nothing if not patriotic. I was going to put a link to the video but I'd rather not sully my blog with the reeking detritus that is FOX News commentary. Rather, I started thinking what if I had to write report card comments for Red Eye host, Greg Gutfeld. I wonder how they would read?

Hmmm....

Greg Gutless....er....Gutfeld...(Is that a surname or a neurological disorder?)

Dear Ms. Gutfeld

Greg....

- engages in destructive self-stimulating behaviours (ie. banging head against the blackboard)
- insists on spelling his name with a "6"
- does not appear to be toilet trained yet
- frequently mentions sleeping with a stuffed George Bush doll
- fails to grasp that "pizza" is not a state capital
- refers to Dick Cheney as "my daddy"
- does not understand the benefits of toilet paper
- engages in highly inappropriate touching with class bully Bill O'Reilly
- frequently states that Ann Coulter is his biological father

Additionally, if you could bathe your child on a daily basis and send them to school with a drool bucket (or failing that, a large bib) it would be greatly appreciated.

(Feel free to add your own)

And yes, I know this tool issued an apology but hey, sorry Greg, its not good enough. Gutfeld, Benson, Schulz (nice tie by the way....were you ever beat up in school? I bet you were)....wipe the retarded grins off your faces, grow up, learn what comedy is, learn about your Allies, get educated and grow a brain!

1 comments:

Tracey said...

TB's blog post sums up my opinion on this topic.